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October 5, 2018 |0 min read

Funny Furballs: Jokes and Trivia for Cat Lovers

Written by

Sharilyn Vera



Cats have a reputation for being aloof and even snobbish, but we know better, right? Here are just a few of our favorite cat-themed jokes and trivia tidbits to share the next time someone tells you cats aren't funny!

Cat Jokes:


Cat Jokes
What's the worst cat to invite to a card game?
A cheetah!

What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws. The other is a pause at the end of a clause.

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Claws.
Claws who?
Claws the door; I’m getting cold!

What is a cat's favorite color?
Purrple!

What do you get when you cross an octagon with a cat?
An octopus.

Two cats sat looking into a green canary's cage.
The first cat said to the second cat, "That's not a canary. It's green!"
The second cat said, "I don't know. Maybe it's not ripe yet!"

A police officer stops a man in a car with a panther in the passenger's seat.
"What are you doing with that panther?" the officer asks the driver. "You should take it to the zoo!"
A week later, the officer sees the man again. The panther is still there in the car, and this time, they're both wearing sunglasses.
"I thought you were going to take that cat to the zoo?" the officer asks.
The driver nods and says, "I did. We had so much fun that we're going to the beach this time!"

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What do you call a cat that's a really good swimmer?
A catfish.

Where did the cat go to get a new tail?
The retail store.

Why are cats such bad storytellers?
They only have one tale.

What do you get when you cross a cat with a parrot?
A carrot.

What do you call an old Tom cat?
Grand-Paw

What do you call a cat police force?
Claw enforcement.

Which vegetable do cats like the most?
As-purr-agus.

If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on?
Their paws.

Which side of the cat has the most fur?
The outside.

Where do sophisticated cats go?
The mewseum.

What do cat actors say on stage?
Tabby or not tabby, that is the question.

A woman invited her neighbor over for dinner and introduced her four cats. "That's Alogue, Aract, Erpillar, and Astrophe," she announced.
The neighbor was surprised and asked, "Where on Earth did you get those names?"
"Oh, those are their last names," the woman said. "Their first names are Cat."

What is the most prestigious award a cat can earn?
The Purr-litzer Prize.

Trivia:


Sunglass Cat
  • A wealthy, 94-year-old Italian woman named Maria Assunta passed away in 2011 and left her estate to her cat, Tommaso. What was this lucky kitty's take? A whopping $13 million! That'll buy a lot of catnip!
  • Sir Isaac Newton invented the world's first cat flap. His cat, Spithead, kept pushing the door open and ruining his experiments that needed to be conducted in darkness. Newton then created the cat flap to save his experiments and allow Spithead to come and go as he pleased.
  • There is a commemorative tower in Scotland built in honor of a cat named Towser. This prolific hunter caught nearly 30,000 mice in her lifetime!
  • It's commonly believed that ancient Egyptians were the first to domesticate cats and own them as pets. However, the oldest known pet cat was found in a grave on the island of Cyprus. The grave is 9,500 years old--4,000 years older than the earliest known Egyptian artwork depicting cats!
  • Staff members of Holland's embassy in Moscow, Russia, noticed that two Siamese cats living there kept meowing and clawing at the building walls. The owners investigated, expecting to find mice in the walls. Instead, they found microphones hidden by Russian spies; the cats heard the microphones when they turned on!

Do you have a favorite cat joke that we missed? Let us know down below in the comments!

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Written by

Sharilyn Vera

Sharilyn is a proud cat owner, long time storyteller and researcher. Her work spans beloved podcasts, television shows, media outlets, and independent documentaries. She likes to strike a balance between education and comedy, which you can hopefully tell when you read her articles!

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